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A Charlie Chan Affair
A Marriage Made Only in Hollywood?!
Happy Mother's Day!
Jean Harlow Weds Paul Bern
THE NUPTIALS OF CAROLINE
KENNEDY*
On July 19, 1986, Caroline Kennedy, 28, married
Edwin Schlossberg, 42, president of a company that designs museum interiors and exhibits, at Our Lady of Victory Church in
Hyannis Port, Massachusetts. As the groom's mother, Mae Schlossberg, left the church, she tripped on the steps, in clear
view of many of the four hundred guests. Fortunately, she was more flustered than injured
The music and dancing went
on into the night at the Kennedy compound in Hyannis Port. By nine forty-five p.m., heavy fog had rolled in from the
sea, making it impossible to see the fireworks display planned by author George Plimpton, his gift to the newlyweds.
"The high point of the reception was when the rockets went up in the clouds and were never seen again," said guest and author
John Kenneth Gaibraith.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 101.
DICK RODGER'S ROCKY HONEYMOON CRUISE*
On March 5, 1930, composer Dick Rodgers and his
wife, Doroty, were married after a chortship that began aboard an ocean liner and culminated in a ceremony in her parents'
living room on park Avenue in New York City.
Considering how the couple
had met, it seemed only fitting that their honeymoon be aboard a ship--yhe U.S.S. Roma. About ten days into their
trip, the peaceful sea calm was shattered. Dorothy was awakened at five a.m. by Dick's painful moans. HE was cinvinced
that he wa having an appendicitis attack. An operation wasn't necessary; they spent two days ashore in a monastery in
Taormina, where with ministrations from the monks and his new wife, he recuperated enough to continue the wedding trip.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 234.
FRANKLIN ROOSEVELT WEDS*
In retrospect, March 17, 1905, Saint Patrick's Day,
probably was not the best choice for a wedding date. But Eleanor and Franklin Roosevelt wanted then-President Theodore
Roosevelt (uncle of the groom) to give the bride away, adn he would be in New York City that day to make a speech.
The wedding wa held in
the elegant side-by-side homes of Eleanor's relatives at Six East Sixty-sixth Street, just off Fifth Avenue. Just as
some of the most restigious names on the the Social Register--Vanderbilt, Van Rensselaer, Mortimer, and Sloane--were
making their way to the wedding, the Saint Patricks Day parade was heading down Fifth Avenue. Eleanor, resplendent in
her gown, and bejeweled with a collar of pearl, a dianond bowknot and diamond crescent fastening her veil, was escorted down
the staircase by the President.
Slowly but surely, the
boisterous strains of "The Wearin' o' the Green" approached and overrode the stately "Wedding March." Curious onlookers,
who broke through police cordons in hopes of seeing the President, grew noisy ad restless. Guests were hard-pressed
to hear any of the wedding music, or the thoughtfuly chosen words of The Reverend Endicott Peabody, friend of Eleanor and
Franklin, who was performing the ceremony.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 127.
GEORGE PEPPARD WEDS FOURTH WIFE*
When Actor Goerge Peppard, then 56, exchanged marriage
vows with his fourth wife, actress and painter Alexis Adams, then 28, they each took some literary license woith the phrasing.
First George put some heavy emphasis on the "richer" part of the vow, for "Richer or for poorer." Then, Alexis began
her vows nervously with, "I, George, take you . . . " George immediately jumped in and interrupted his soon-to-be-wife
with the quip, "Not so fast. You're not wearing the pants in this family yet!"
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of
BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 5.
HUGH HEFNER WEDS KIMBERLY CONRAD*
Even on the wedding day, June 1, 1989, guests
and freindsx of the couple found it hard to believe that the eternal swinger, Playboy guru and founder Hugh Hefner,
then 63, was really going to marry former Playmate of the Year kimberly Conrad, then 26. The minister who officiated
at the nondeminational Caivornia ceremony at the Playboy mansion found the event incredible, too. Immediately after
Hef said "I do," the Reverend Charlies Ara asked the audience at large, "You heard him say that? Everbody out there--he
siad it!"
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 139.
THE NUPTIALS OF JESSIE WOODROW WILSON*
November 25, 1913, was the wedding day of Jessie
Woodrow Wilson, President Woorow Wilson's middle daughter, to law student Francis Bowes Sayre. The couple followed the
tradition of not seeing each other until the ceremony.
Frank and his best man
had taken a walk and returned in time to dress and drive to the White House. When they arrived, the front-gate guard
could not be convinced that frank was the groom; neigher Frank nor his best man had an invitaition or any other proof with
them. Frank pleaded that the wedding couldn't take place without him. "You'll have to tell that to the captain,"
said the guard. "I have my orders, and this is a very special White House occasion.
Finally,
when the captain was summoned at Frank's request, he listened to the story and alowed the groom to attend his own wedding.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 94.
JOAN RIVERS WEDS JIMMY SANGER*
By her own admission, the first wedding of Joan
Molinsky RIvers was a mistake. The rabbi who performed it probably has mixed feelings aobut it, as well. Joan
Married Jimmy Sanger, a young man she met while working at Bond's stores. At the end of the ceremony in the New York
City Park Avenue apartment of Joan's aunt, the rabbi reached through an elaborate arrangement of candles and caught the sleeves
of his robe on fire. Bridesmaid Nancy Heath was very impressed. She told Joan that she had never been to a Jewish wedding
befoe and did not realize that the rabbi was sacrificed at the end!
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 163.
LAUREN BACALL WEDS HUMPHREY
BOGART*
Malabar Farm in rural Ohio, home
of two of Humphrey Bogart's friends, was to the beh romantic setting for the May 21, 1945, wedding of the actor and Lauren
Bacall.
While
the bride was upstairs getting into her wedding dress, she suffered from a bad case of nerves, and found herelf running to
the bathroom every few minutes. No sooner had the first chords of the "Wedding March" sounded than she ducked in again.
After a
few minutes of music, still no bride. Bogie caled up the staris to see what was sgoing on. The response, shouted down
the stairs for all the gathered guests to hear, was loud and clear: "She's in the can!"
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of
BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 7.
LOU GEHRIG SHUTS OUT HIS MOTHER*
From the moment they became engaged, Eleanor and
Lou Fehrig, the famous New York Yankee baseball player, knew that Lou's mother would be hard to handle. Prone to tantrms
and hsterics, Mrs. Gehrig had a particularly extreme emotional outbreak the day fefore Eleanor and Lou's scheduled nuptuals.
Lou rushed to New Rochelle, whre Eleanor was moving into their new apartment. Carpet Layers, plumbers, telephone installers,
adn other workers were scurrying about; newly delivered furiture was stacked in corners.
Lou reprted that his mother
was in an alarming state and would probably not calm down for the wedding day. Rather than risk a scene the next day,
they decided to marry then and there. Lou phoned the mayor of New Rochelle, who arrived a shrot time later with a police
escort. With Eleanor in her apron, Lou in his shirtsleeves, and the workers as guests, the mayor perofrmed the marriage.
An ersatz reception followed, with champagne (on hand for the next day) quickly chilled with ice rounde up by the janitor.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published
by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 77.
LUCILLE BALL WEDS DESI ARNAZ*
The romance of Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz was as
wild and zany as their stage peronalities. On the same day that Lucy told the press their careers were too demanding
for them to marry, Desi decided that they should. In fact, he said he wasn't waiting; they should marry the next day,
Novermber 30, 1940. Certain that he could get a friend--a local judge in Greewich, Conneticut--to waive the requisite
five-day wait, Desi promished to be back in New York City to preform at the Roxy Movie Theater that same night.
In Greenwich the next morning,
the couple discovered they had forgotten two essentials: A Wasserman test and a wedding ring. While Lucy and Desi
Rushed out for blood tests, Desi's agent and manager combed the town of Greenwich for a wedding ring. His frantic search
ended with a ten-cent copper ring from the five-and-dime. Lucy and Desi used the ring from during the ceremoney and
later had it coated in platinum.
Desi's close-to-the-wire
timing didn't allow for delays. By the time the ceremoney was over, even a police motercycle escort didn't get them
to the Roxy on time. Desi carried Lucy over the threshold of the dressing room and the show as announced. The
restless crowd was more than forgiving when the couple took the stage and announced their happy news.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the
editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Pengquin Group; 1993; page 35.
MAYOR DIANE FEINSTEIN'S MAJOR SLIPUP*
Diane Feinstein, then mayor of San Francisco, and her fiance,
Richard Blum, had planned a European honeymoon after their wedding on January 20, 1980. But plans called for a stop
in Washington, D.C., to meet with Vice PResident Mondale. Unfortunately, an unexpected occurrence put a crimp in her
plans. Ms. Feinstein fell in the White House driveway, fractured her arm, and spent her honeymoon wearing a sling.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 238.
PRINCE CHARLES WEDS DIANA SPENCER
PRINCESS
MARGARET WEDS ANTONY ARMSTRONG-JONES*
bishop of Canterbury Robert Runcie was
tolerant of Diana Spencer's slipup when she recited her vows to Prince Charles. Nervously repeating her marriage vows
in front of millions at St. Paul's Cathedral in London on July 29, 1981, she reversed the order of her fiance's many names,
calling him Philip Charles Arthur George instead of Charles Philip Arthur George. Jst minutes later, almost gallantly,
he could be heard to also flub his lines slightly, omitting the word worldly from his promise to share all his worldy
goods. Nevertheless, the ceremony proceeded without pause.
The officiant
at Princess Margaret's wedding to Antony Armstrong-Jones was not so understanding. On May 6, 1960, Dr. Geoffrey Fisher,
then Archbishop of Cantrbury, allowed no one to stray from proper form. Whe the princess stumbled over her vows, he
stopped and had her redo them.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors
of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 10.
QUEEN ELIZABETH'S SNAPPY TIARA*
On November 20, 1947, Princess Elizabeth and Philip, Duke of
Edinburgh, were married. The princess arrived, calm and composed despite a stressful morning. Moments before her tiara
was to be secured to her veil, the band had snapped, necessitating a last-minuted call for a jeweler wo made palace calls.
Then, the princess realized she had misplaced her bouquet. The palace was searched from top to bottom, and the bouquet
finally located in a refrigerator, where a concerned footman had placed it to keep it fresh.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of
BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 49.
QUEEN VICTORIA'S TRAIN COLLISION*
When Queen VIctoria married Albert of Saxe-Coburg
on February 10, 1840, her train measured eighteen feet. That may seem excessively long, but there wasn't enough of it
fo the twelve bridesmaids to carry down the aisle without causing a mishap. Lady Wilhelmina Stanhope, who was later
the Duccess of Cleveland, reported that the bridesmaids "were all huddled together, and scrambled rather than walked along,
kicking each other's heels and treading on each other's gowns."
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors
of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 44.
QUEEN VICTORIA-EUGENIE'S VIOLENT PROCESSION*
On the wedding day of Queen Victoria-Eugenie of
Spain, a granddaughter of Queen Victoria, extremists in Madrid threw a bomb at the bridal processin. Before attending
her own wedding reception, a shaken but regal queen had to change out of her blood-splatered white satin gown.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of
BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group; 1993; page 42.
RITA HAYWORTH WEDS ALY KHAN OF YAKIMOUR*
The press had harassed Rita Hayworth throughout
her romance with Aly Khan of Yakimour, especially faulting the actress for gallivanting with her lover around the world with
her four-year-old daughter (Rebecca, whose father was Orson Welles) in tow. The couple wanted a private ceremony at
Aly Khan's Chateau de L'Orizon, away from prying eyes.
French law required weddings
take place in public, but Khan thought he could persuade French authorites to allow a private wedding and so printed up invitations
for Ma 27, 1949, at the Chateau. A reporter's protest invluenced the judge, however, and their ceremony site
shifted to Town Hall in the tiny town of Vallauris.
As required by low, royalty
and peasants alike were allowed to witness the rite. Reporters, who were barred at first, were also allowed in--if they
behaved.
Someone didn't behave,
however. Hayworth's white Cadillac convertable had to be repained before it could be used for the wedding. En
route from the United States, it had been covered with graffiti--greetings to the sultry actress from her fans
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 95.
ROSEANNE BARR WEDS TOM ARNOLD*
When actress Roseanne Barr married her second husband,
Tom Arnold, in February 1990, at her Benedict Canyon, California, home, the traditional custom ofthe bride and groom feeding
each other a piece of cake got out of hand.
The cake went beyond elaborate.
The first layer was chocolate with Bavarian-crem filling, and was covered with white-chocolate icing. The second nad
third layers were of carrot cake with cream cheese and apricot frosting. White orchids of different sizes decorated
each tier, and elaborate latticework covered the sides.
By the time the customery
cake-cutting was over, both bride and groom had eaten two entire tiers of te cake themselves, their faces, hair, and clothes
were covered with icing and crumbs. Nedless to say, this less than appetizing spectacle ensure that plenty of cake was
left over for the first anniversary.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 190.
SLIM JIM PHANTOM MacDONALD WEDS BRITT
EKLAND*
When Stray Cats member Silm Jim Phantom MaccDonnell
married actress Britt Ekland on March 21, 1984, neither of them anticipated that a construction crew would be using an electroinc
jackhammer on the pavement in front of the bride's home. The noise was so loud that none of the guests could hear themselves
think, let alone catch a word of the couple's vows. The bride went out into the road in her wedding gown and pleaded
with the crew to take a break. They complied, and the wedding proceeded as planned.
*Wedding Nightmares; as told to the editors of BRIDE'S MAGAZINE; A Plume Book, published by the Penguin Group;
1993; page 129.
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